The Importance of Accountability

For the first time in my life, I am a part of an accountability group.  I have never had an official accountability partner, although my husband is an invaluable sounding board and support in leading me in a godly, biblical direction.  Another dear friend has also provided a helpful degree of accountability.  As she says of our relationship, “We can talk about trivial things but usually bring it back to how we should act or respond in Christ.”

Last night I met with my accountability group of five ladies for the first time.  After a fantastic first night of sharing and bonding, I am excited about the potential of growing together in our walks with the Lord.

But why does accountability matter?  Is it truly worth sacrificing a couple of hours a week of family time, relaxation, or other events to meet with these ladies for this purpose?

Yes!  And God tells us exactly why.

“But exhort one another daily, while it is called ‘Today,’ lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.”  Hebrews 3:13

Christians are to exhort one another, which means we are to caution, advise, and even warn our siblings in Christ.  We are to teach and be teachable, correct and be corrected.  We are to encourage each other, which includes not only sending a thoughtful note or complimenting someone on a job well done, but also supporting and gently nudging one another towards growth in godly character, biblical knowledge, and spiritual wisdom.

This is accountability! 

And it is important, as the urgent tone of Hebrews 3:13 suggests.  God commands it.  Our faith in His Word should compel us to obedience with or without a reason for it.  Yet in this instance, God gives us what we wish we had in every command from Him: an explanation, an answer to the question “Why?”   

Satan’s job is to deceive, which is about all he can do, but deception is powerful.  Accountability (exhorting one another) counters Satan’s work.  When we encourage, teach, correct, pray, and in general urge and motivate one another to grow biblically, we are less likely to be deceived by sin and have our hearts hardened against God’s righteous way.  Rather than being unable or unwilling to recognize God’s truth, accountability helps us clearly distinguish and accept it.  We grow not only in character and knowledge, but also in spiritual discernment. 

Furthermore, we produce more fruit in our lives – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control - and God is glorified.  Not only is accountability an act of obedience to the Lord and a way to prevent being deceived by the enemy, but its results also glorify God to the world around us. 

Is accountability important?  Absolutely!

Overcoming the Monotony of our Home School

Organized, methodical, prepared, task-oriented… these are all my strengths.  

Creative, spontaneous, imaginative, carefree… these are far from my strengths! 

So what’s a mom/teacher to do when she realizes that her kids find their school routines boring, even at home? 

Of course, my logical personality repeatedly explained that life is not all about being entertained and having fun.  Work must be done.  Sometimes labor is enjoyable, but other times it is tedious.

Still, I knew my kids had a point; our school days were in need of some liveliness.  After surveying the boys on what they would consider a fun addition to our home school and then pondering and praying over their input, an idea surfaced in my typically unimaginative brain – a system of rewards that I (not so creatively) penned “School Year Incentives".

Now, my practical side knows that in this life we are not always compensated to the same degree of our diligence and that that our motivation should not merely be to get a prize.  As a result, I have been hesitant to give tangible rewards.  After all, we should learn first and foremost to do our best for God’s glory rather than selfish gain. 

But my other practical side realizes that children who receive much of their education outside of the home have their own rewards, including parties, prize bins, certificates of honor, and lunch and recess with friends everyday.  So I am willing to compromise a bit on my “reward” stance.

I decided upon an incentive system in which the boys earn points (given in pennies) which may be accumulated and then redeemed for items from the “shopping list”.

Certain behaviors - listening, obeying, and having a good attitude – are expected and are not a means of earning points, although misbehavior may result in losing points. 

Exceptional academic performance - including completing daily language and math assignments without error, scoring high on tests and reports, memorizing historical documents, watching documentaries, and reading extra books - are several ways to earn points.  The boys are not only motivated to work more carefully and diligently, but also to take pleasure in the extra effort they are putting into learning.

Items on the shopping list include but are not limited to the following:

10 points – a candy bar

25 points – a Dairy Queen blizzard or a bag of candy

35 points - invite a friend over

60 points – no chores for a week

75 points – movie date (including popcorn) with either mom or dad

100 points – $10 cash

Hmmm… maybe I should create an incentive list for myself!

Not hitting the snooze button in the morning = 1 point

Staying awake while Zachary reads out loud = 1 point

Not checking emails or facebook before school is finished for the day = 1 point

Not panicking when Brandon cannot figure out an Algebra problem = 2 points

My “shopping list” would look much like the boys’ list.  Undoubtedly, I would work towards a Blizzard, no chores for a week, and a movie date.

When I first introduced our new plan and read through the “shopping list”, the boys became so ecstatic they laughed uncontrollably!  (Yes, we really needed some fun in our school days!)

The new addition to our school year is no substitute for loving, consistent discipline, whose foundation was laid years before we ever considered homeschooling.  But it is a nice supplement that is providing a little more joy to what had become a rather monotonous school routine.

“…for your work shall be rewarded!” 2 Chronicles 15:7b

Fourteen!!

A mom never forgets the events surrounding the birth of her firstborn child, or any other of her offspring for that matter.  Over fourteen years ago, those events played out in my life.  It was an exceedingly stormy, summer night with massive downpours.  If all the “old wives tales” about heavy rain leading up to a baby’s birth were true, I was going to be delivering my son soon. 

I guess those old wives knew what they were talking about!  Just after 10pm, as Mike and I were getting into bed, my water broke.  Our little boy would be appearing shortly, almost three weeks ahead of schedule.

Upon arrival at the hospital, a quick check (as well as much painful confirmation) revealed our son was feet first – not a position in which he could safely be delivered naturally.  Within about three short hours, I was stretched on an operating table as the doctor delivered eight pound, two ounce baby Brandon via caesarean section.

The general consensus by the hospital staff was that our little boy looked just like his daddy.  While some of his features have changed over the years, his personality is a lot like his dad’s – patient, level-headed, self-controlled, and content. 

Of course, no child is perfect.  We see the best and worst in all of our kids.  But we are very proud of Brandon.  He successfully juggled a great deal this year, including a challenging eighth grade academic schedule that included several high school courses, piano lessons, a part time job, basketball, and Awana (both as a leader and a student).  Additionally, he wrote twenty-two Disney blog posts for the Mouse for Less website and has more in the works. 

And did I mention he wrote a book... in a month?! 

One of his highest accomplishments this year included completing a reading of the entire Bible, which he began in second grade.  His goal is now to read through the Bible in one year.  So far, he is on track!

Furthermore, he continues to be an excellent big brother, quick to offer help with difficult Lego creations, challenging puzzles, various projects, and school work.  He won Zachary’s admiration (and mine) by taking time out of his busy schedule to help his youngest brother build Star Wars paper airplanes. He is thoughtful with me, too, always ready to lend a helping hand when needed, at times without even being asked.

We celebrated Brandon’s fourteenth birthday last month.  My parents came to town (bringing him back from a week’s stay with them) for some of the festivities.  I cooked spaghetti, his favorite food, and served our family’s traditional M&M birthday cake.  The next day, he invited one of his oldest friends – one he played with before they could even talk – to supper at Sonic and a local minor league baseball game.  The following day, we celebrated with another tradition: cinnamon rolls for breakfast!  He enjoyed lots of birthday wishes all weekend from family and friends.

How thankful we are for that sweet little baby boy who has become a responsible, delightful fourteen year-old young man!!

“We give thanks to God always for you…” 1 Thessalonians 1:2a